An Officer should be comely, spratly and above all else, confident in his own dress and bearing.

He should, where possible, eat a small piece of meat each morning with molasses and beans.

He should air himself gracefully when under fire and never place himself in a position of difficulty when being shot at.

He should eat his meals comfortably and ahead of his soldiers, for it is he who is more important tactically on the battlefield and therefore he who should be well nourished.

His hair should be well groomed and if possible he should adorn a moustashe or similar facial adornment.

When speaking to his soldiers he should appear unnerved and aloof and give direction without in any way involving himself in the execution of arduous or unofficer like duties.

He should smoke thin pantellas except when in the company of ladies when he should take only a small gin mixed with lemon tea.

He should be an ardent and erudite gentleman and woo the ladies both in the formal environment and in the bedroom where he should excel himself beyond the ordinary soldier with his virulent love making prowess.

These I say to you are the qualities of an Officer that set him apart from the lay person and the common soldier.

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Officers and Gentle(wo)men

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